Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon
by Confesser Kahlan
Summary: Written with my friend Rikku (formerly Anara). The Sequel to FF8. After the Armageddon. You know, the one that never happened! Guest appearances by FF7-10 characters.
1. Squall

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Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

Disclaimer #1: They're mine. All mine! (Sees lawyers coming) I… uh…well… Actually Squall and company belongs to SquareSoft. But you could give them to me. Give, give, give! Please?! No?!? (pouts) Tch… fine…

Disclaimer #2: No characters were high or drunk during this story. The authors on the other hand, had had TOOOOO much Sugar. 

A/N: (Anara made me write this) When Irvine is alone with a girl, Don't Take It THAT WAY! Okay? Good!

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Chapter 1: Squall

Squall Leonhart walked towards the doorway of the Ragnorak. President Laguna Loire had asked to see him. He spotted Laguna talking to Kiros and Ward. Laguna looked up.

"Squall! How are ya doing?"

Squall rolled his eyes. "Whatever. You wanted to see me?"

Laguna cleared his throat nervously. "Um… Squall… I… uh…"

Squall sighed impatiently. "Yes?"

Laguna took a deep breath. "I'm your …"

Squall felt a chill run up his back. "My…uncle?"

"Noooo. Your…"

"My uncle's best friend?"

Laguna shook his head. "No. Your…"

Squall took a deep breath. "My uncle's best friend's father's sister's son's cousin's mother's former roommate?"

Laguna blinked. "No. I'm your father."

"What!?" 

Squall felt the room close in on him. He saw the open door, looked at Laguna. 

'Door, Laguna, door, Laguna. Choices… DOOR!'

"Nooooooooooooooo!!" 

He ran to the door and jumped. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH…"

Laguna ran to the door and saw Squall, falling through the air. 

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…"

Laguna looked over his shoulder. "Zell! Quistis! Someone help!"

Zell came running, Quistis close behind. Zell looked around wildly. "What?! What is it?"

Laguna was near tears. "Squall… He… Jumped out… the dooooor…"

Zell looked out the door. Squall was sitting on the ground, right next to the parked Ragnorak, looking confused. He looked at Zell. "What happened?"

Zell just shrugged and glanced at Laguna, who was still babbling. "Hurry! We can still save him! Hurry! Get a rope!" 

Zell raised an eyebrow, looked at Squall, who was looking around, and glanced back at Laguna. "Um…Laguna? I THINK he's safe."

Laguna stared at him. "What are you talking about? He's falling to his death!"

Quistis cocked her head. "Laguna. The Ragnorak is parked. I seriously doubt that Squall is in any danger of falling to his death."

Laguna's jaw dropped. "What?!"

Zell nodded. "Look for yourself."

Laguna liked out the door at Squall, who was now standing up. Laguna grinned. "Squallie! You're alright!"

He ran out to hug his son. Squall saw him coming, screamed and fainted.

****************************************************************

One hour later, in the Ragnorak…

Squall slowly opened his eyes, only to see Laguna looking at him. "Laguna?"

He slowly sat up and groaned. "I had the worst nightmare, Laguna. I dreamt that you said that you're my father."

Laguna grinned. "Well, Squall…"

He glanced at Zell and Quistis, who were shaking their heads franticly. He continued. "That wasn't a dream. I AM your father!"

Zell threw his hands in the air and Quistis hung her head and groaned. "Here we go again. Zell, be ready."

Squall nodded his head. "Really. My father." 

He calmly stood up and turned toward the door. He glanced once more at Laguna, then at Quistis and Zell. "Excuse me. NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

He ran towards the door. Zell, Quistis, Laguna and Kiros (who had wisely stayed in the background until now) ran after him and caught him. Squall struggled to get away, screaming. "Nooo! You can't be my father! It's impossible! How can you be my father?!"

Laguna blinked. "You mean you don't know? Squall it's time we sat down and talked about the Birds and the trees."

Kiros rolled his eyes. "Laguna, it's the Birds and the BEES. And I don't think that was what Squall meant."

Laguna blinked again. "Oh. Sorry."

Squall broke free and looked at the door. The hallway seemed to grow, the door was a mile away. Laguna was also looking at the door. He frowned. "Weird. The hall just grew. Squall, did you see that?"

Kiros turned to stare at Laguna. 'Oh boy. Now he's seeing things!'

Squall was looking at Laguna, then at the door. Laguna… Door… "Eeep." 

Everyone stared at Squall. Squall recovered. "Whatever."

Squall frowned. 'Great, Laguna and I have something in common.' "Eeep." 


	2. Laguna or ‘So that’s where I put the LSD...

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Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

Disclaimers: See Ch. 1

A/N: BTW, I do love the characters of FFVIII!(except for Stupid Rinoa, I'm tired of saving her! Grrrr!)

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A/N: black angel, Spork, and PERSON37: Thank you for the Reviews! You are my new best friends. ;) Luv Ya!

****

Chapter two: Laguna (or 'So _that's_ where I put the LSD!')

Everyone was staring at Squall again. Laguna grinned. "You _did _see it! Great! My son and I have something in common!"

He put his arm around Squall. Squall screamed and took of for the door again, but Laguna and Kiros caught him. Squall continued to scream.

Zell looked around and spotted a small bottle of sedatives. He opened the bottle and grabbed a small capsule, which he forced Squall to swallow. "C'mon, this will make it all better." 

Squall collapsed, startling everyone. They stared at him. Laguna looked at Zell. "You killed him."

Zell pouted. "I did not!"

Quistis shook her head. "Zell, he's not breathing. You killed him."

At that moment, Rinoa walked in to the room. She saw Squall on the floor and shrieked. "ZELL! WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

Zell frowned. "What makes you think _I_ did anything?"

She shrugged. "Nothing. I just felt like blaming you."

Quistis nodded. "Yes, it's easy to blame everything on Zell. But in this case, it _is _Zell's fault. He gave Squall a sedative and Squall collapsed. He's not breathing. Zell killed Squall Leonhart." _(Dun dun duuunnn!)_

Irvine (who had magically appeared sometime during the conversation) cocked an eyebrow at a very much alive Squall, who gave him a goofy grin in reply. Irvine then turned towards Rinoa. "Um, Rinoa? Squall's alive."

Rinoa nodded absently. "That's nice Irvy. Zell, how could…"

Everyone blinked and turned to look at Irvine. Quistis was the first to speak. "Irvine? Where did you come from? I thought you were in Galbadia. How did you get here?"

Irvine shrugged. "I just magically appeared. Anyways, just so you know, Squall…"

He broke off as Squall jumped up. Everyone turned to stare at Squall, who ignored them. "Pretty colors!"

He turned and grinned at Laguna. "Hey Dad! Wuuuzz up? Guess what? I'm the Commander of SeeD, and the Son of the President of Esthar. All bow to me!"

He started to dance around, giggling. Laguna stared, then grabbed the blue bottle. He looked inside and brightened. "So _that's _where I hid the LSD!"

"WHAT?!?!"

Laguna winced as the word echoed around the room. Everyone (except Squall, who had begun to sing "Over the Rainbow") started towards Laguna but stopped as the Ragnorak took off. Selphie's voice came over the intercom. "Whoo hoo, we're flying!"

During the distraction, Laguna swallowed one of the LSD capsules. He thin looked at the door. Angry crowd, door, angry crowd…door!

He ran for the door of the now flying ship. Kiros and Ward rolled their eyes and ran after him to try to keep him out of trouble. (Riiight.) Squall looked at them and followed. "Dad, wait for me!"

Irvine blinked. "Dad? Did I miss something?"


	3. New Friends, Poor Them

Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

A/N: Gundam Pilot Washu-chan and PERSON37- Thanx for Reviewing! Luv Ya!

Chapter 3 New friends (Poor people!)

Rinoa

Rinoa sat against the wall of the cargo bay, crying softly. She looked up when she heard a noise to her right, and startled. A young man with blue eyes and dark hair, wearing a SeeD uniform was standing next to her. She frowned. "Who are you?"

He grinned. "I'm an Anonymous SeeD who appeared out of nowhere. I don't have a name. Wanna go out with me?"

Rinoa sniffed. "My boyfriend just fell to gruesome death. I'm in mourning."

The A.S. nodded. "I'll wait."

Rinoa resumed crying and sobbing. Five minutes later she stood up and smiled at the A.S. "I'm done. Let's go!"

The two went off on a romantic date out of the cargo bay door, falling out of the flying Ragnorak. The A.S. died a gruesome death, but no one cared. However, Rinoa, like a cockroach, survived. (Snaps fingers in disappointment.)

**********************************************************************

Squall

Squall sat up and looked around. He was in a large dirty city. Laguna and Kiros were lying to his right. Ward was nowhere to be seen. As he watched, Laguna sat up and groaned. "Squall? Son, where are we?"

Squall glared. "Don't call me son! And I don't know."

Laguna pouted. "Fine, be that way! See if I care. Maybe that guy with yellow spikes on his head can help."

"Yellow spikes?"

Squall looked to his left. Sure enough, there was a guy with yellow spikes, walking with a girl with what looked like water balloons on her chest, a man with a gun on his arm, and a big cat. (A/N: Think you know who they are? You might be surprised.)

Laguna grinned and started jumping up and down, waving at the people standing five feet away from him, as if they pass by without seeing him. " Hi! Hihihihihihihi! Can you help us, people I don't know?"

Squall stared at him. "Shouldn't you be sober? The LSD should have worn off by now."

Laguna stopped jumping and waving, and frowned. "Yea, you're right."

With that he took out the dreaded BLUE BOTTLE and took a capsule. He waited a moment, then resumed jumping and waving. "Hi! My name's Laguna Loire and I'm the President of Esthar, the prettiest country in the world, but I hate my job because I didn't have a choice and this is my son, Squall Leonhart Loire, doesn't he look just like his mother, but he has my smile, I think, but I don't know because he never smiles at me."

During his little speech, Laguna had thrown his arms around Squall and was now holding him in a strangle hold. Squall was starting to turn blue.

The guy with spikes and his friends were staring at them. Spike closed his eyes, shook his head, and smiled nervously. "Um, President Loire? Uh…"

Laguna looked at him with a vague smile. "You can call me Laguna."

Spike blinked and continued. "Right, Laguna. Um, first, your son is turning blue. You might want to let him go."

Laguna looked at Squall, who was about to pass out, and let him go abruptly. Squall fell to the floor in a heap, gasping for breath. "La-Laguna…I-I-I'm gonna…KILL…you when… I-I get up."

Laguna smiled cheerfully. "Looking forward to it."

He turned back to Spike and co. Spike was still staring at him. The others were sitting on the ground, playing Go Fish. 

Spike cleared his throat. "Riiight. Anyway. My name's Cloud Strife. The cat is Red XIII, the woman is Tifa, (and yes those are real, not balloons) and the man with the gun arm is Barret."

At this the man stood up angrily. "For the last time, Strife, MY NAME IS DYNE!! Barret was left at the Gold Saucer. You kidnapped me!" (A/N: Hah! Fooled you! Thought it was Barret, didn't you?)

Cloud ignored this outburst. "We're on the to the hospital, to get help for Barret. He seems to think his name is Dyne, which is ridiculous. Who's the dead guy?"

Laguna glanced at Kiros, who was still out cold. "Huh? Oh, that's Kiros, he's not dead, just out cold because we all jumped out of the Ragnorak, the dragon shaped air ship that I gave to Squally for his birthday."

Squall, having got his breath back, stood up and glared at Laguna. "One: Don't call me 'Squally'. Two: You haven't given the Ragnorak to me. Three: My birthday isn't for three months, you moron. And four: Whatever."

Laguna blinked. "Oh. Well, Squall I'm giving the Ragnorak to you. You're Fifteen, I think you're respons…"

"I'm SEVENTEEN!"

"…You're Seventeen, I think you're responsible enough to have your own ship. And it's for all of the birthdays that I missed, because I was ruling Esthar and you thought you were an orphan. So Happy Birthday, Son!"

Squall blinked. Then blinked again. "…Oh, Okay. Thanks. Whatever." 

Spike…err, I mean Cloud, and the others were watching with tears in their eyes. "Awwww."  


Cloud smiled at Laguna. "You, your friend and your son are welcome to join us. The doctor can look at your friend too."

Laguna grinned and gave the startled Cloud a quick hug, "Oh, thank you! Yes we'll join you, won't we Squall?"

"Whatever."

With that, they tied Kiros to the back of a protesting Red and set of on a quest to find the hospital for Kiros and Barret/Dyne.  



	4. I said, 'Don't take it THAT WAY'

Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

Disclaimer: See chapter one

Chapter four: I _Said_, 'Don't take it _That Way!!"_

Quistis knocked on Irvine's door and quietly turned the doorknob at his muffled, "Come in."

She closed the door behind her and turned around to see Irvine walk into his bathroom, with a towel wrapped around his waist and his clothes in one hand. "Hope you don't mind, I just got out of the shower. I'll be right out", he called over his shoulder.

Quistis shook her head. "No it's fine. I just wanted to know if you had seen the cockroa…ah…I mean, Rinoa."

The bathroom door opened and Irvine walked out dressed in his chaps and vest. He picked up his coat. "The last time I saw her, she was crying over Squall jumping to gruesome death. Why? Worried about her?"

She snorted. "Hardly. She owes me 50 Gil. Oh, well. So, do you think Squall is dead?"

They walked out the door. Irvine grabbed his hat and shook his head. "'Course not. The authors of this story are unable to kill off the main characters. If they could, Rinoa would be dead by now."

"I see what you mean. Wait. What authors?"

Irvine shrugged. "I have no idea. It just came to me."

Quistis shrugged, closed the door, and straitened her skirt while Irvine placed his hat on his head. Just then, Zell came running down the hall. He skidded to a stop, glanced at the door and stared at Quistis and Irvine. "**Irvine! **With Quissy?!?"

Irvine frowned at him, puzzled. "Huh? What are you talking about?"

Quistis however, understood at once. "**WHAT?!"**

Zell and Irvine watched, stunned, as she collapsed in a dead faint.

Irvine blinked, then turned to Zell. "You killed her."

Zell glared at him. "Okay. First: She's not dead. Second: Why are you blaming me?"

"It IS your fault. 'Sides, you're just so easy to blame."

"**ARRRGG!!!"**

Meanwhile, at the Golden Saucer…

Barret walked back to the main room. "Cloud? Tifa? Hello? Where is everybody?"


	5. What's going on?

Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

Disclaimer: See chapter one

A/N: This chapter was written by Anara.

Thanx Zoheret and Dove! Luv ya!

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Chapter 5: What's going on? 

Quistis opened her eyes and sat up. 

"Where am I?" she looked at Irvine. 

"Your in the infirmary." 

"Why am I in here?" 

Zell walked into the room. 

"Ah, good, your awake." he looked at Irvine. "Told ya she's not dead." 

"Dead? What are you talking about?" 

"Well see it's like this," Zell started. Irvine was making a cutting motion with his hands, signaling for Zell to stop, but you know Mr. Know-it-all, just can't keep his mouth shut. 

"See what happened was you and Irvine walked out of Irvine's bedroom together at the same time I came running around a corner, and you were straightening your dress and Irvine put on his hat and I accused you two of..........." 

Quistis looked from Irvine to Zell then fainted. 

"ZELL!" 

"What?" 

"You did it again!" 

"Hey its not my fault" 

"Yes it is!" 

"Why does every one always blame me?" 

"'Cause you*re the one who always does these things!" 

"I am not" 

There was a beeping noise then the intercom turned on, "Hey do you think you two could stop arguing for one second?" 

"What is it Selphie?" asked Irvine.

"You guys should come up here and take a look at this." 

Zell and Irvine ran from the room. 

"Tell Selphie I'll be right there" 

"Where are you going now?" said Zell. 

"I need to go do something real quick" 

"Tch. Fine, just hurry." 

Irvine turned and ran through a wall. 

Zell tried to stop but tripped over his own feet and landed with a thud on his butt. "What the? Ok that was the freakiest thing I have ever seen." he got up and took the elevator to the control room. 

"It's about time you got here" 

"Sorry I had a little..............accident" 

"Again? Zell how many times have I told you not to do it on the carpet?" 

"WHAT? NO! Not that kind of accident." 

"Oh well.........hey where's Irvine?" 

"He said he would be right here, but as for where he went? I have no idea" 

Just then Irvine appeared out of thin air "Hey guys, wuz up?" 

Selphie looked at Zell "Did he just do what I think he did? Ok, well, whatever, do you guys think this could be a problem?" she pointed out the window. Zell and Irvine gasped as they saw the huge black storm coming straight at them. 

****************************************************************************** 

"Hey what's that?" 

"Zidane would you stop changing the subject, please?" 

"Ok, but first what is that?" 

Princess Garnet looked up at the sky "I don't know, you think it might be Kuja?" 

"No Kuja's not powerful enough to cause somethin' like that" 

As the two watched they saw a big red air ship fly out of the storm, and a small figure drop from it. 

****************************************************************************** 

"Guys I think we have a problem." said Selphie. 

"What was your first clue?" 

"Hey Zell be nice, its not her fault." 

"So what, its mine? " 

Irvine took a second of careful consideration before answering. "Yes." 

"AAAGGGGHHHHH!!! I've had enough of this." 

Quistis entered the room just as Zell ran out. "What was that about?" 

Irvine shrugged his shoulders, "I dunno." 

"Oh well, I just came up here to tell you guys that crewman 687 just fell out of the Ragnorak to a gruesome death below." 

"Thanks for the heads up Quissy." 

Irvine looked out the window at the black storm coming back their way. "You might want to tell everyone to hold on to something." 

****************************************************************************** 

"Did you see that?" 

"What is it now Zidane?" 

"It looks like it dropped something." 

Princess Garnet turned away from Zidane and started to walk back toward Alexandria. 

"AAHHH, why do I even bother with you Zidane?"

"Hey," yelled Zidane. "Where are you going?" 

When she kept walking and didn't answer Zidane ran after her. 

"Hey! Wait for me!!" 

****************************************************************************** 

Meanwhile back at the Golden Saucer 

"Excuse me sir but have you seen a man around here, around yea high, with spiky blonde hair? Or a girl with brown hair, and really big.............that look like balloons?"


	6. Lost

Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

Disclaimer: See chapter one

A/N: This chapter was written by Anara.

Chapter 6: LOST 

"But I told you I'm Dyne not Barret" 

"Yeah, yeah, Barret we know, we know." 

" Don't worry when we get to the hospital we'll have you fixed up like new." said Tifa 

"Wha-what are you going to do to me?" 

"We're not going to do anything to you silly, we'll leave that to the doctors." 

"Doctors? But I hate hospitals! I hate doctors! Why are you doing this to me?" 

"Geez," said Squall. "Your buddy over here is really freakin' out. Are you guys sure he really isn't this Dyne character he claims to be?" 

"Don't be ridiculous of course he's Barret, he's just got Mako poisoning." 

Squall and Laguna looked at each other. 

"What's Mako?" asked Laguna. 

"Its this green stuff that comes out of the ground," said Cloud. 

"And why do you call it Mako?" asked Squally. 

"We don't know, every one calls it that, it all started when the big cheese at a company in some city we live in started making Gil off of it." 

"Whoa," said Laguna putting his hand on Squall's shoulder. "That is sooooo deep." 

"Whatever..............................are we almost there," asked Squall. "I don't know how much more of this I can take." He brushed Laguna's hand off his shoulder and glared at him. Laguna grinned. 

Cloud looked at Squall and Laguna, then at Tifa and Red. "I need a drink" 

"Hey a nice glass of water sounds good to me too," exclaimed Laguna. 

"I think I'll need something a little stronger than that." 

******************************************************************************

"Excuse me sir could you tell me... uh sir......................excuse me ma'am but could you help me..........................." 

"Hey Barret what are you doing here?" 

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! What the? Who said that?" 

"Barret down here." 

Barret looked down and saw a big white thing holding a black and white cat. 

"Oh hey Cait Sith what are you doing here? I thought you were with Cloud and company." 

"Well I was but then we went into this temple thingy and Cloud got controlled by that evil man we're trying to kill and the temple thing shrank and I got smooshed, and when I woke up I was here." 

"Wait if you were smooshed then how could you 'wake up' here?" 

"That's a very good question and as I don't know the answer right now you can write to the creators of our characters and ask them, but it's a very complicated process and I don't suggest you even consider doing it." 

"Well then why did you even mention it?" 

"Well I....................hey that's a good point, and I really don't know the answer to it right now but, if you want you can write to the creators at SQUARESOFT and ask them..........." 

"Hey, hey, hey man I didn't ask for a thirty page answer. Just a simple 'I don't know' will suffice." 

"Oh sorry Barret, but it was a very technical question." 

"How was it technical?" 

"I don't know, but if you want..." 

"No. Stop. Don't go any further." 

Barret turned his back to Cait Sith and walked toward the Chocobo races. 

"Hey Barret" 

Barret spun around. 

"What?"

"You're going the wrong way, the exit's this way." 

Cait Sith pointed in the opposite direction. 

"Oh................................thanks" 

Cait Sith smiled. "No problem." 

****************************************************************************** 

Squall stopped dead in his tracks and looked around. Laguna was walking with Cloud, talking the poor guys ear off. 

"Man he really needs to get rid of that blue bottle," he thought. 

He looked around again. 

"Yep, something is definitely wrong." 

He ran in the party's direction. 

"And then after I saved Ellone I joined this resistance group to get rid of.................." 

"Hey Cloud?" yelled squall. 

Cloud turned around and looked at Squall. 

"What?" 

"I think we've been going in circles." 

"What do you mean?" asked Tifa. 

"Well we've passed that bridge over there twice." 

"So?" 

"So, unless your world is a giant copy of itself we might have a problem." 

Red looked around then sniffed the air. 

"Squall that's ridiculous there's no possible way............." 

"He's right!" said Red sniffing the air again. "We've been going in circles." 

"Great!" said Dyne, "First you guys kidnap and drag me all the way out here, you won't believe me that I'm not Barret, you threaten me with doctors and hospitals, and now you got us lost and going in circles, it can't get any worse." 

"Yes it can," said Laguna. "There could be vampires or a dentist." 

Everyone glared at Laguna. 

"What?...............there is nothing scarier than a dentist." 

Squall walked toward the bridge. "I think it just got worse," he said as he passed Dyne. He stopped just before the bridge. "So, how do we get out of this one?" 

"Well," said Laguna. "We could jump out of your ship I gave you and start all over again." 

Squall put his hand to his head. "Dad you need to stop taking those pills!!" 

"Oh Squally," yelled Laguna. He ran over and gave Squall a big bear hug. "I knew you would accept me as your father." 

Squall looked to Cloud who was laughing hysterically. 

"Get off me, get off me," he pushed Laguna away. "It slipped out, I didn't mean it." 

"Yeah sure you didn't." Cloud walked over and put a hand on Squalls shoulder. "Squally." 

"Ok that's it!!" Squall grabbed the dreaded blue bottle out of Laguna's hand and threw it into river. "Its time for you to start sobering up, and when you do then maybe I'll recognize you as my father. Until then stop calling me Squally." 

Laguna smiled his biggest smile. "Ok Squally." 

Squall hung his head in temporary defeat (just like the authors when they can't figure out what to do next). "Whatever, can we please find a way out of this?" 

****************************************************************************** 

"Ok I don't need your help." 

"Yes you do. Where are we now? You got us lost again didn't you?" 

"Why is it my fault?" 

"Because, Zell, you're the one driving." Rinoa shook her head. "Why do you always get everyone lost?"

"Hey you're the one who's giving me directions, so you can't blame it all on me." 

Rinoa looked at Zell. "Yes I can." 

Zell turned on the intercom. "Can someone please come up to the control room, we have a big infestation of the cockroach kind." 

Rinoa rolled her eyes. "Fine Zell, if you don't want my help you could have just said so." 

"I did." 

"Whatever." Rinoa left pushing past Selphie on her way out.

"Geez, what a pain," said Selphie. "And I thought having to save her all the time in the game was bad." 

"Hey Selphie do you have a clue where we are?" 

"Well Irvine thinks we'll get out of this soon." 

"Yeah but, how soon, and that doesn't answer my first question." 

"Well if we fly around then eventually the storm will end and we can figure out where we are." 

"So we just fly around no matter what?" 

"Yeah, basically." 

"So even if we hit a bird?" 

"Yep." 

"Even if we hit a passing ship? Or a mountain? Or the engines stop and we all fall to our deaths in some alternate world where no one knows us or will care?" 

"Zell." 

"What?" 

"Maybe I should drive for a while." 

"Be my guest, but if anything bad happens it's not my fault." 


	7. Surprise

Final Fantasy VIII 2: After the Armageddon

(You Know. The one that never happened!)

Authors: Confesser Kahlan and Anara 

Disclaimer: See chapter one

A/N: This chapter was written by Anara.

Thanx Kaori Niimura. I know, poor Squallie (snicker). Luv ya!

****

Chapter 7: "Surprise"

Guest appearances by "The Thing" 

"Woo hoo, hey everyone guess what?" yelled Selphie over the intercom. "We finally got through the storm." 

"Great, but where are we?" 

"Well Zell why don*t you go help Irvine find a place to land and maybe we can find out where we are." 

Selphie looked at Zell. Zell looked at Selphie. 

"Ok," he said with a big smile on his face. 

****************************************************************************** 

"Hey Tidus, lets go practice we*ve only got three days till the match in Luca, ya know." 

"Ok, I got a new shot to show ya anyway. Check this out Wakka." 

Tidus performs his fathers Jecht shot. 

"Wwwoooaaahhh! Hey that was good, ya. But its goin* really high. Think you hit it too hard?" 

"Ah don*t worry about it, it will come down before it hits something." 

****************************************************************************** 

"Hey Selphie let me drive for a bit." 

"Ok Zell, but you have to be careful." 

"Don*t worry about it I*ll be able to see something coming way before it hits us." 

Selphie gets out of the seat and lets Zell take over. 

"Hey Zell," said Selphie while Zell was strapping himself into the seat. 

"What?" 

"What*s that?" 

"What*s, what?"

"That," she pointed out the window. "Its blue and white, and almost looks like a ball." 

"It is a ball....................what*s it doing up here?" 

"I don*t know but your gonna hit it." 

"So its just a ball." 

"You forget that this ship has been sitting out in space for a couple of decades. Its sensitive." 

"Whatever, Selphie." 

The two watched as the ball came closer and closer. Then they heard a smack as the ball hit the side of the ship. 

"See, that wasn*t so bad now was it?" 

Selphie looked at Zell with skepticism. The engine started to sputter then died. 

"Oh no, Zell look what you did." 

"Me?" 

"Yes you." 

"What did I do?" 

"You ran into that ball, I told you that this thing was sensitive." 

"Well sorry, but we have bigger problems now." 

"Like?" 

"Like, how the hell do I land this thing?" 

****************************************************************************** 

"Yo Tidus, look at that." 

"What?" 

"That red thing fallin* out of the sky, it looks like its goin* to crash in the ocean." 

"Yeah, but what is it?" 

"It looks like it could be a sinspawn." 

"Somehow I really doubt that Wakka." 

****************************************************************************** 

"What are we gonna do now?" 

"Zell if you just land it in the ocean then everything will be fine." 

"Ok, but for the record this is not my fault." 

"We*re keeping record? Cool I'll go tell the others." 

"Wait! Help me crash this thing first." 

"Don*t you mean land?" 

Zell looked at Selphie out of the corner of his eye. "Uh........right, right, sure Selphie.....................

Land." his eyes darted around the room. "Whatever you say, you*re the boss." he nervously put his hands back on the steering wheel. 

Selphie turned around to go and turn on the landing gears and almost ran into Irvine. 

"Whoa, Irvine, where did you come from?" 

"I don*t know, I just appeared." 

"Well I figured that out, but I asked from where?" 

"Oh, well see here*s *The Thing*." he holds up a glass jar with a miniature alien thing (from the movie "The Thing" by John Carpenter) inside. "I was on my way up here when this *Thing* appeared and in my attempt to get rid of him, he picked me up and threw me up here." 

"Then how did you get a piece of him in that jar?" 

"Well........I have no idea." 

"It was just some crazy idea one of the authors came up with off the top of her head." 

Irvine and Selphie looked at Zell. 

"And how would you know this?" 

"Because she wanted me to know." 

"Right Zell, whatever you say.........maybe you should let Selphie crash this thing." 

"Why does everyone say crash? We are trying to land it, ya know?" 

"Uh, right Selphie." he put his hands up surrendering and backed away slowly. "I-I meant land." he picked up "The Thing" in a jar. "He-here*s a present for you. See isn*t it a, uh nice.............

....... *Thing*?" He held the jar out to Selphie as he got more distance between them. He then set the jar on the ground. "I*ll just leave this for you here." He turned, ran to the elevator and escaped before Selphie could say another word. 

"What*s up with you guys today? You seem unusually nice to me. Did I miss something?" 

"Now why would you think that Selphie?" Zell was getting more and more nervous. It wasn*t everyday your friend had a birthday and everyone forgot. It wasn*t their fault though, so much had been happening that it just slipped everyone*s mind. Irvine made the mistake of saying "present" in her presence, hours of planning had gone into the party, but Irvine had to slip and say the wrong *Thing*. "Damn you Irvine." 

"What did you say Zell?" 

"I-I-I didn*t say anything, you must be hearing *Things* again. Heh, heh." He was definitely nervous now. Maybe I should just keep my mouth shut. 

****************************************************************************** 

Quistis saw Irvine running her way. 

"Don*t go up there." 

"Why, Irvine what did you do now? You didn*t tell her did you? Well did you? Irvine how could you? That was supposed to be a surprise. Hours of planning wasted." 

"Hey wait a sec. I never said anything, you just jumped to the conclusion that I said something, when in reality I said nothing." 

"Nothing?" 

"That's right, nothing.................except present." 

"IRVINE." 

"I didn*t mean to, it just sorta slipped out......................you don*t know the kind of pressure she put me under, horrible mind control experiments and, and looking at me." He got close to her face. "With her eyes. Poor Zell, he has to stay up there with her, I don*t know how he can possibly stand it, he must be going crazy by now." 

"Irvine you over-react most of the time you know that?" 

****************************************************************************** 

I*m going crazy, I can*t take much more of this, I need to scream but I can*t cause she*all hear me. Then my cover is definitely blown. Oh, what am I gonna do? Maybe some one will come up and take over for me, oh its no good wishing. The way Irvine ran outta here no one will come up, they*d be too scared. "Someone please help me?" 

"Zell are you sure your ok?" 

"Yes," He said in a weak voice. 

Selphie turned back to her work. Man every year they do this, like I don*t know their planning a party for me. They acted the same way last year. Oh well guess it will be kinda fun messing with their minds for a while. 


	8. Resolution

Chapter 8: Resolution 

Quistis stepped on the elevator pad that led to the control room. Zell is going to freak when I tell them were not in our world anymore. He's going to say, "I told you so, but did anyone listen to me? Nooooo!" Quistis shook her head and pressed the up button. I hate it when he's right. 

****************************************************************************** 

Selphie had a big smile on her face. "Hey Quistis, you got any news on where we are?" 

"Actually, yes. It was the main reason for my coming up here." 

"T-t-the 'main' reason? Y-you mean you have another one?" stumbled Zell. 

Quistis took a look at Zell's white face. "Not any more." Zell looked at her with pleading eyes and mouthed the words 'Help Me'. She turned around to look at Selphie who was still pressing a whole bunch of buttons trying to get the landing gears down. "Having problems?" 

"Yes, I can't seem to get anything to work. Zell, I told you not to fly into that ball thing." 

"Ball thing? What ball thing?" 

"This big blue and white ball came flying at us, I told Zell not to hit it but you know him, never listens." 

Zell turned around in the pilot seat and looked at Selphie only to find her looking back. He quickly turned around and pretended that she couldn't see him. 

Quistis looked at them skeptically. "Right guys, any way I came to tell you we're in another world, some kind of alternate dimension or something. I can't be to sure which." 

"I told you this would happen," said Zell. "But did anybody listen to me? Nooooo. I hate to say I told ya so..." 

"Then don't say it," interrupted Quistis. 

Zell uncharacteristically shut his mouth and sat quietly in the pilot seat. 

Meanwhile...

The Ragnarok proceeds to drop out of the sky, (and you thought they would have hit the ground by now) but at the last possible second corrects its self and lands perfectly on a cliff overlooking the ocean, just as the sun sets on the horizon. 

******************************************************************************

Tidus and Wakka watched as the thing landed on the cliff above them. 

"Well you think we should go have a look?" asked Wakka. 

"Its getting kind of dark, don't you think we should go back to Besaid?" 

"Why?" 

"Well Yuna or Lulu might get mad or worried. You know Rikku will." 

"Ya, so?" 

"So we can go back and get them and be back here in the morning. I very much doubt that they will go any where." 

Wakka looked at Tidus. "Eh, guess you're right, come on, let's get back before we get yelled at." 

Wakka and Tidus start walking back to Besaid. 

******************************************************************************

Back in Midgar, our heroes were no closer to finding out their location than before. In fact, they had gone around in circles three more times before trying a new direction. 

They stopped in an alley to take a break. Laguna looked at Cloud. "Wow, pretty world you got here. I just love the smoke and pollution and grime and dirt and thieves and murderers and…."

He was cut off by several loud thumps. Everyone (except Kiros, who was still out cold) looked towards the sound. To the side of the alley, Squall had begun to bang his head against the wall. Cloud cleared his throat, "Squall? Are you okay?"

Squall looked at him for a second, glanced at Laguna, who was staring around with a vague smile, then continued to beat his head against the wall.

Cloud blinked. "I'll take that as a no."

*******************

Sephiroth took another drink of his beer and looked up as the door to the dim bar opened. He stiffened as he saw Cloud enter with his friends. Three of them he recognized, but the sullen boy wearing black leather and the hyper man with black hair were new to him.

The boy glanced at him, and then did a classic double take. "Seifer?!? What are you doing here?"

Sephiroth frowned as the boys friends stared at him. "Who? I'm Sephiroth. Who are you?"

The boy frowned. "Seifer, it's me, Squall. Squall Leonhart…"

The hyper man interrupted, "Squall Leonhart _Loire._"

Squall glared at the man. "Whatever. Seifer, are you alright? If you think you're someone else…"

"Hey!" Squall glared at the man again. The man continued, undaunted. "He thinks he's someone else! Just like Barret! Seifer can come with us to the hospital! We'll get there and have a huge party!"

He started to jump around in joy.

Sephiroth just stared. _These people are nuts!_


	9. My Mistake

****

Chapter 9: My Mistake   


"Hey Quistis have you seen Irvine?" Selphie looked around.   


"No. Why?"   


"Huh? Oh, no reason."   


Irvine peeks his head around a corner (big mistake #1) Selphie sees him.   


"Hey Irvine!!"   


"AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!" Irvine runs down the hall towards the room with the stairs (big mistake #2). He skids to a stop right before the stairs and looks up. Selphie is at the top looking down at him.   


"EEP!!" Irvine spins around and runs back the way he came. _Wait a minute!! If I go this way then she'll cut me off again_. He stops running and turns around. _Ok I just have to make it to..._   


"OH IRVIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNEEEEEE??? Where are youuuu?"   


Irvine looks around for a place to hide (big mistake #3) but finds none   


*********************   


Selphie walks through the doors into the cargo area and looks around. "Hmm.... now where can he be? We need to talk about something!" Selphie looks at the door under the stairs. "He's in there I just know it!!   


*********************   


From his hiding place under the stairs Irvine peeks his head out and looks around. _She'll never find me in he...._ The door opens and Irvine sees the shadow of a small figure surrounded by light. He holds his breath.   


*********************   


Selphie looks around the narrow room for any sign of life. "Hmmm.... Irvine? I know you're in here!" She walks into the room and looks around a little but doesn't find Irvine anywhere. Selphie shrugs and leaves the room calling, "Irrrrrvineeeeee??"   


*********************   


Irvine lets his breath out and crawls out of the heating duct. "Man I'm surprised she didn't look in there!!" Irvine stands up and was dusting himself off when the loud speaker came on.   


"Irvine, Selphie, and Zell please come to the cockpit we have a situation!"   


"Great! Wonder what's going on now!" Irvine runs out of the room and up the stairs to the little elevator. When he gets there he feels someone tap his shoulder so he turns around and jumps at the sight of seeing Selphie behind him.   


"I was looking for you Irvine! And you ran from me!" she crosses her arms and glares at him.   


"You were? Oh wow! I didn't know that!!" Irvine tries his best to look innocent. He looks at Selphie glaring at him. "What? I didn't know! But, I... My mistake?"   


"Yeah right! Your mistake, HA!"   


All of a sudden Zell runs around a corner and bumps into the two of them. "Oh man! I'm so sorry Selphie! Don't hurt me please?" Zell cowers before her.   


"Why would I hurt you?"   


"Because you...wait did you just say why?" Zell gets up and looks at her with wide eyes. "You mean you won't hurt me?"   


"As I said before why would I hurt you? I might hurt him!" Selphie points to Irvine. "But I'm not gonna hurt you!"   


"WWWWWOOOOOOOOO HHHHHHOOOOOOO!!!!" Zell yells and jumps up and down. "You're not going to hurt me!!!"   


Irvine looks at the giddy Zell. "Yeah but what about me?"   


Selphie looks at Irvine. "Don't hide from me next time!" She pushes past the two guys and gets on the elevator. "Are you two coming or what?"   


Zell jumps on the elevator platform and gives Selphie a big hug. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!!!"   


"Ok Zell that's enough!! You can stop hugging me now!........... Zell.........Zell!............ I'm getting angry!"   


Zell lets her go and stands with his hands behind his back. "I'm sorry Selphie."   


"It's ok Zell just don't let it happen too much!" She looks at Irvine. "So you gonna get on or what?"   


Irvine looks at Selphie with a worried look but gets on the platform any ways. He pushes the up button to the cockpit.


End file.
